"Sometimes we assume a plan He had us on for one part of our lives is a guaranteed plan for the rest of our lives, and that isn't necessarily so."
I dropped my internship last week and a few days before that I made the decision to walk away from the music industry completely. (at least for now)
I guess the best way to explain it is relating it to something my CMC instructor told us. He said, “If you can find something else to do with your life, do it.” I had always wondered if that was me or not. Some days I’d be gung-ho music and be 100% confident that that’s what I wanted to do. Other days, I wasn’t so sure and I could see myself doing something else. (as long as I liked what I was doing)
As of last week I was on my 4th internship within the music industry. That internship was honestly one of the best, if not the best, (or “best fit”) internships that I’ve had. I really like the people there and I like what they’re doing….but it’s just not me.
You’re supposed to wake up and be excited (or at least actually like what you’re doing). I wasn't quite there.
In contrast, I was more excited about the days I worked at the junction because I liked what I was doing. Working on the procedures manual, social media, marketing, training, HR, interviewing… That is all stuff that directly relates to my degree and I actually REALLY like it! That’s exciting to me.
When I woke up on Friday’s and realized I had a local show, it felt like school... something to check off of the list, but not something I was really passionate about.
It was partly that and partly the timing. Burnt out maybe? I had been going non-stop since I don’t remember when…I just needed some time to myself. Working 7 days a week and not being able to go to MY church or go to a small group or hang out with friends... it's a real drag.
Not going to lie... sometimes I liked the music industry simply because it was unique and "cool" and something that everyone seemed interested in. It gave me a leg up somehow and elevated my status. I mean, come on...working at a concert venue or working at a place called EnterTRAINment Junction. Which sounds cooler to you?
But guess what? I don't really care anymore.
I don't care.
Another thing that I would like to point out... is that it's ME making the decision to walk away. No one else. The internship from this summer could say all they wanted to about me, but it didn't stop me. (although there were times in which it came close) I kept at it though... I kept pursuing "the dream" and I had two more great internship opportunities after the bad one. These last 2 internships (or half internship) are the ones that I will choose to remember; places that had moral integrity, treated people well and with respect and fostered a positive atmosphere. That in and of itself is worth celebrating.
I still like music, don't get me wrong. And I'll probably still help out with concerts on occasion. If a job offer (within the music biz) comes up, I would most likely take it, but I'm not pursuing it anymore. I'm not going to go out of my way for it anymore.
Its been a good run... I've learned a lot, met so many great people, and have had a lot of good experiences. And for that, I am thankful.
