Why you gotta be so ... scared?

It's funny when people say things to me like, "I don't know how you do it" and "you're so brave," and "I could never do what you do."  (traveling solo) 

Why is that funny? Because I'm the biggest scaredy cat and worrier on the planet. I worry about EVERYTHING. 

I don't think people realize (except for the ones who are close to me and hear this from me on a daily basis) just how freaked out I can get about traveling. Most of the fears are completely unrealistic. Some of them are realistic, but taken to the extreme... 

For this upcoming Asia trip, for example, I have already worried about getting through customs, getting detained in China, getting deathly sick from food/drink, etc. Currently I'm having anxiety about earthquakes, volcanoes, plane crashes, and radiation in Japan. Go ahead and laugh because some of it is completely ridiculous, but I was reading articles that talked about earthquakes and eruptions before the year 2016... which means they WOULD HAVE TO HAPPEN THIS YEAR IF THE THEORIES ARE CORRECT. (Especially with the latest that's going on in Nepal, I think I'm even more paranoid) 

So why do I do this to myself? If I know that I'm prone to worry and have anxiety over this stuff, why do I do it?  

Because I have to move forward.  

I want to travel. I want to see the world. And I can't do that sitting at home. 

I have proof time and time again...that every time I fear something, I come out at the other end feeling more confident and an overwhelming sense of being glad that I did it. It reminds me of the quote from The Circle Maker, "The older you get, the more faith you should have because you've experienced God's faithfulness. And it is God's faithfulness that increases our faith and enlarges our dreams."

I don't think fear is necessarily a bad thing...If I didn't have a single ounce of fear when I traveled around to different places, I think there would be something wrong with me. But fear can't overwhelm and dictate my life. 

#IKnowHowThisStoryEnds #ThankYouGod